You are just 5 steps away from finding your Life Partner
“Of course I want a life partner you may be saying why else would I read this?” Our society considers it important for women to be in a relationship. There is still a perception in many quarters that a woman without a relationship is unhappy. Our friends and relatives want us to be happy and fulfilled and so encourage us to find a life partner. The media also exerts pressure on women to be part of a couple. Many women have mixed feelings about this, which often shows up in them selecting unavailable partners. This is particularly true where the woman concerned has a history of choosing unavailable men. We all have a right to choose a partner or not choose one. We also have a right to decide when we will choose our life partner. If you are enjoying life as a single and currently have no desire to find a life partner please continue to enjoy your life as a single. Only you can decide when and if to choose a life partner. It’s not a decision to be made in order to please others or because you feel under pressure. Making a decision under these circumstances wouldn’t be right for you or any partner that you choose.
Step 2. Define your life partner.
Whether you want a new pair of shoes, jacket, home or life partner you can’t have it until you define it. If you have any doubts about this imagine the following. You are at the Railway Station and ask for “a ticket ” “a ticket to where?” would be the response. “Somewhere nice” you might say or ” somewhere where I will be happy”. Its clear what type of response you would receive. It would be along these lines ” madam, until I know exactly where you want to go I can’t provide you with a ticket” It’s exactly the same with a life partner we have to have a clear picture of him before we can find him. “What do I mean by a clear picture?” you may be asking. You need to know what kind of man you want to share your life with and what kind of life you want the two of you to share. Your answer to those two questions will be as individual as you are. For example I am an animal lover and would not have chosen a partner who disliked or was indifferent to animals. Here are some headings to help you identify your ideal man. His looks, height, build, hair colour, eye colour etc? His personality outgoing, quiet, demonstrative, sporty whatever appeals to you? His lifestyle, what kind of work he does, home he lives in, car he drives, how he spends his spare time? Of course finding a life partner isn’t like ordering a take away pizza you may not get all that you desire. The important thing is to know on what you will and will not compromise. For example you might think “I can live with some untidiness but not a man who can’t get on with my parents” Or ” I’ll watch football every Saturday for the right man but he has to be someone who takes my opinions seriously”. It is also important to visualise your shared future, the type of life that you would live together.
Step 3. Get pro-active.
It’s only in fairy stories that the handsome prince beats a path to our door. In reality we have to make an effort to find him. This means getting out and about and being in situations where you will meet males. This may seem obvious. Many women who don’t have time to socialise due to work or domestic responsibilities have problems in finding a life partner. If you are in this situation there is a technique’ which is perfect for you. Its called “random and specific search”. Even if you have lots of time to socialise I would still recommend that you use it. Most women only look out for their ideal man when they are in social situations. In reality attractive available men are around all the time. Just like you they travel to work on the train, walk their dog, go to the supermarket, attend evening classes, take their Mother out to dinner, they may even use a unisex hairdresser. I am not suggesting that you give your home number to every attractive man you exchange a few words with in the park or supermarket. Begin by being aware that attractive available men some of whom you would certainly like to know better surround you. Situations with an ongoing element are particularly useful for example evening classes or interest groups. These will allow you to meet, talk with and observe the behaviour of potential partners in a number of situations. I’ve just described the random element of random and specific search. The specific element is fairly self-explanatory. For example my friend’s elder sister was happily married to a Greek man. She wanted to follow in her footsteps and visited Greece as often as her budget would allow, ate in Greek restaurants and learnt Greek dance.